‘Tis the season! You see it everywhere! Thanksgiving didn’t come yet, but Christmas is all around. It;s like everyone wants to be more than they are, faster! I wish I had a big remote to rewind the world to…turkey season.
What nobody tells you is that turkey is really a big chicken! In all that description entails! At best, a combination of chicken with peacock. But there’s nothing wrong with that! There is a little chicken in all of us..and, depending on who you are, a lot of peacock…
First thing I remember from this morning was cozying up in bed, when something wooshed by my door, and the thump-thump-crack followed…I looked at the clock and it was a ridiculous 6:30. Oh, c’mon, it’s Saturday! “Little feet”, I yelled, or thought I did anyway, “go back to bed!” No noise occurred…oh, well… I’ll just stay a few more minutes. My eyelids fluttered shut and, for a split second there, I drifted back in the cozy spot of my brain that hadn’t fully awoken yet. Then thoughts started skipping from one synapse to the other, tickling my sleep and annoying my relaxation…to do list is huge today..oh, and time…oh, and that birthday party, I didn’t get a gift…of course I didn’t, I only got back home at 7 last night and dinner didn’t cook itself!..and so on.
I slithered out of bed so I don’t wake up the spouse, and dragged myself to the kitchen. Little feet was happily snuggled on the couch with his ipad. “Oh, for the life of technology Tuesdays! It’s only 6:30…ipads should be banned”…smart remark came immediately “so should coffee! it’s not good for your tummy, you know!”. There’s a saying I adopted here in Texas, “bless your heart”, and it fits like a glove on all my sentences…so my barely awake brain gave it a “bless you little heart and your smart mouthing!”..and focused on setting up the percolator.
Soon the smell of fresh coffee traveled through the house, and light started to fill the room. Ahhh! Mornings…My cup was soon steaming fantastic creatures and the aroma embraced my lungs…soon, very soon, I will make the shopping list.
Fast forward past the laundry at 7:00am part, feeding the seemingly awake mouths, and to being in the car, on my way to the shopping center. At a stop light, the scent of turkey fresh out of the oven tickled my nostrils…Oh, turkey! I completely forgot! That’s what we were supposed to do next week! The stores were decently populated with the likes of me, sleeping bodies who were sent out into the cloudy day in search for food…the idea that I am such a pilgrim grew even stronger in my head…I am the one searching the earth for a better place for my family, finding the food, shelter and making friends with the natives… I guess I could celebrate the real thing….me.
But how much of a peacock does that make me? And shame took over my mind and heart. I’ve been a peacock a lot lately. There are many excuses for it, and all so justified, but none completely true. I flashed my feathers, and strutted around for enough time now. Anything I might have had to compensate for, or prove, has been long accomplished. I thought about yesterday…about hurting my spouse without even knowing…coming, in my mind, from a completely innocent perspective. But after hearing the other side I felt humbled and ashamed. It was not how I saw things, but isn’t that what peacocks say? Me, myself and I…we’re always right…and while I was truthful in my heart, I was in the wrong as far as the world could figure. People don’t read minds, so how could anyone understand the truth? One can see what’s right in front, but not see the whole picture, just that part that happens then and there….and isn’t that the truth as well? And is hurting my loved ones so that I can shine a thing I can accept? Not likely!
I’m going back to being chicken. Cold turkey. No excuses! No personal points of view on the topic. The peacock is too much drama for my taste. And since I didn’t find the balance yet, I might as well just drop the act and go back to being me. Although, the new me was fun and has given me the most intense, pure, unrestricted, secure way to be creative.
We are bound by the rules we chain ourselves with, and though chains mean slavery to most, no chains makes us too unattached, too light, and every gust of wind can blow us further an further away from home….and home is where the heart is…and the heart is never wrong!
I found myself in front of the turkeys – the frozen ones. To complete the irony, a sale was on; they were so cheap that I just had to have three…even if only to remind myself of the kind of bird I am. But turkey is great! Tasty, lending itself to many types of dishes, gregarious…with enough chicken in it to know its place, and with a little peacock to stand out only as much as needed. Hey! I could be a turkey! I really could! And that would solve the problem…and restore the balance.
My facial expressions must have shown all this conversation, because I looked up, and across the turkeys was an old man looking at me very puzzled…”need some help there?” he said shyly. “Thank you! I’ve got it! It was not an easy choice, but I’ve got it!” and I me and my turkeys turned around and headed to the cashier….